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♥ Madeline Chew
1st Jan 1986

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Friday, November 18, 2005

nv did i felt so "buang" before... 3 papers - math, electronic and programming, are over and all the 3 papers make me feel so upset and disappointed with myself. like what sis has told me "i should make friend with "confidence" and bother "stress". ya i did and it did make me feel a bit better each time and more relaxed. however, i still didn't do well, i guess. i couldn't finish all the papers and couldn't do a lot of qns. what's wrong with me? i did study for all 3 papers, but yet i couldn't do well. why is this so? is it because i didn't do my very best? i played too much? i really don't know what is the reason for that... there is a saying that goes like this "you reap what you sow", so how true is this phrase? ya i know that it is stupid to let go now when i have made it so far and i promise myself not to be that stupid. but each time things just make me demoralize, make me fall again when i have just picked myself up. i bucked up so much courage and took time to stand up again, so can things just go smoother for me? can don't make me suffer so much? i know that each failure and each success is an experience and from all the experiences, i gain something and/or lose something and i should learn from it. but...i have already got a lot of bad experiences so can i have more of good experiences? more good things for me? please...... just i hope that i could pass all my papers and that's it. hope that this little wish can come true. i promise that i will work even harder for the next semester. *promised!* *madeline praying very hard that her little wish will come true...*