i'm hurted. it is not that i don't want this friendship. i treasure it a lot and want to but there is just something stopping me from being in it. i know that it takes time to build a strong friendship and it needs involved parties to do their parts. my heart and mind are just thinking and saying the different thing. they are making me feel so confused and so troubled. i know what i've done have hurt/upset those people ard me. i really don't mean it. tears are always on the verge of flowing out of my eyes when i know there is something wrong between us. but in order not to make thing worse, i held it back and act strong and happy. i enjoyed every moment with them... they are so fun-loving and nice people... i never want to lose them.